Pissed off and bread-like

I got really mad today. If you know me well, you'll know that when I get mad at someone in my family I'm not the usual contained, eloquent me, but I am pretty much harsh and very snappy. I'll swear, I'll yell and I'll snarl. But I'm proud at myself for the way I handled today -- I didn't do any of those things. I guess it's taken 20 years to get used to my mom's outlandish stubbornness and criticisms (my sisters and I like to call it her craziness). Basically, my mom angrily scolded at me and made a big fuss because she thought I had lost the car keys at the grocery stores (they were in one of our shopping bags all along). Granted, it was partly my fault for not paying attention to where I placed them, but it really wasn't her place to accuse me of being irresponsible and "unbelievable." "Will taking her anger out on me really going to get the keys back, mom?"

But despite my very zen-like (or should I say Jesus-like) approach to handling my anger, it was still there. And i took it out on the car and started to drive VERY aggressively on the way back. I sped up to 85 on the highway (i NEVER go past 80) and cut off a lot of cars. Oops. What can I say, I'm a work in progress.


Speaking of which, I came up with this random thought when my mom was making cong you bing yesterday (fried scallion bread). I think people are a lot like bread, or rather, like bread dough. Bread dough, whose elasticity is caused by the gluten of the flour, resists the baker's tugging and shaping until it finally takes on what it is meant to be. Like the dough, we are stretched and molded to conform to what we are meant to be -- what God wants us to be. Sometimes (or rather, many a time) the stubbornness and selfishness in us resists to those changes, but ultimately, our Maker (baker) will do what He intended and we come out beautiful and perfect.


<--- this is not the finished product but all she needs to do it flatten them out and fry them and they're done!










mmmm locquats from my locquat tree!


-a